You WISH I was on drugs.

[lierdumoa]

Dude, I was, like, moments away from posting to the flist asking if anyone knew whether Pete lived in campus housing or at home while in college. And then this showed up.



::WIN::

I'm approx. 2000 words into that fic where Pete is a vampire, but it's not a 16 Candles AU. I really ought to come up with something shorter to call it.


In other news: So I Watched Release the Bats

lierdumoa: now I kind of want a pete turns into a girl fic where he's all disappointed that he can't pee standing up anymore and has to actually, like, take his pants off and squat
lierdumoa: wait, what am I saying -- girls can totally pee standing up
lierdumoa: we just have to be straddling the toilet
lierdumoa: it's the aiming we suck at
fashes: well ... if you jut out your pelvis
lierdumoa: well, okay, pelvis jutting might allow for aiming
lierdumoa: though that would take, like, practice
lierdumoa: oh god, Pete would totally practice
fashes: Of course he would!
fashes: YOU CAN'T TAKE HIS PEEING ON THINGS AWAY FROM HIM
fashes: and depending on the *terrain* it may or may not hit your legs.
fashes: splash back's a bitch.
lierdumoa: well, I imagine not hitting the legs would be easier depending on how skinny your legs are
fashes: actually it depends on if the ground is leafy or not
fashes: dry leaves at different angles on the ground just make splash back unpredictable.
lierdumoa: I was referring to strength of flow and leg spread and having the stream not come down the leg
fashes: ohhhhhh
fashes: Right. It'd have to be jettison'd pee.
fashes: not mid flow or last dribbles
lierdumoa: yes
fashes: Kiegals would help w/ ... dude Pete would be the most dedicated Kiegaler of EVER
fashes: you know pete would be rockin' his Keigals.
lierdumoa: YES. ALL THE TIME.
fashes: and OH GOD WOULD PATRICK EVER THANK HIM FOR THAT
fashes: b'c some people can BREAK THINGS WITH KIEGALS
fashes: BREAK PENCILS AND SHIT
lierdumoa: like, it would just be his thing to do when bored
lierdumoa: play with the new muscles


In my head? Girl!Pete wears skirts all the time. Solely for the purpose of peeing standing up more easily. He just stands astride the toilet seat, panty pulled to one side (if he's wearing one) just letting it rip. This way he can catch any stray trickle before it makes it all the way down his leg.

Joe: It's kinda like Pete didn't turn into a girl at all.
Joe: He just got easy bake crotch surgery.
Joe: Instead of a tattoo.
Pete: ::wanders into the room::
Pete: ::bounces on the balls of his feet a little, watching his chest flop::
Pete: Do my tits seem small to you?
Joe: ...
Patrick: ...
Andy: You're a modest b-cup.
Joe: ...
Patrick: ...
Pete: That's decent, I guess.
Pete: ::wanders back out of the room::

Comments

[natilathehun.livejournal.com]

AHAHAAHAHAHAHA OH MY GOD.

I love Andy.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[purelyironic.livejournal.com]

"Pete is a vampire, but it's not a 16 Candles AU"
"This ain't a scene, it's an arms race"
"It's Not A Side Effect Of The Cocaine. I Am Thinking It Must Be Love"

> I really ought to come up with something shorter to call it.

Why? They can do it, you can do it :-)

[lierdumoa.livejournal.com]

Because I am lazy and dislike all the extra typing?

[diluvian.livejournal.com]

Stating right away that I have never even tried this, but.... if you have the right-shaped external girlparts you can pee like boys.

You have to have inner labia that you can squeeze/fold into a sort of cone, sealed at the back near the urethra and open just enough at the front (near the clit) for the pee to shoot out/forward.

Also, there are gizmos that you can buy -- kind of cross between a jock cup and a funnel -- that does this for you. Popular with hikers, I'm told.

::replete with esoteric knowledge::

PENIS FISH!!!

[fashes.livejournal.com]

I love it when you replete all over the place.

::basks::

[lierdumoa.livejournal.com]

This comment wins in every way possible. OH GOD YOUR ICON.

[ladysorka]

Well, if all else fails girl!Pete could always but one of those plastic camping things that you stick in your crotch and use like a penis/funnel/thing so that you can pee standing up without taking your pants off!

And Andy is best ever.

[lierdumoa.livejournal.com]

I think by the time they got the time to buy one, Pete would already have perfected his technique.

[misspamela.livejournal.com]

Andy, BOOB MASTER. I love it! (Why do I not have an Andy icon?)

[lierdumoa.livejournal.com]

I don't either.

:(((

Perhaps I should do an Andy icon post.

Only Joe Yo.

[fashes.livejournal.com]

Joe: He just got easy bake crotch surgery.

...

Only Joe Dude. Only JOE!!!

[monanotlisa.livejournal.com]

Puh-lease, you can totally pee standing up; it's just a matter of technique (and soap and water nearby). Didn't I share with the class back when I did it that way? *g*