The OC -- recap

[lierdumoa]

Okay, I haven't done one of these before. Here is my very first OC recap.



Okay, OMG. I've been using those three letters far too much lately. It's a stupid acronym. But I can't stop. OMG! OMG! I love my show.

First off, Ryan and Marissa are so not getting back together. Marissa will stop fucking with Ryan's life. She'll be alone in her anorexic stupidity. I mean, dude -- Ryan so does not want her back at all. He is so over her it's frickin *beautifu.*

Second point of interest -- Theresa. Love her. She's smart, and pretty in a healthy way. She doesn't look like a stiff wind would blow her over. And she's not white -- I have a thing for biracial couples.

Okay, so theres some talk at the beginning about Ryan and Marissa trying to 'go back to being friends.' Only there's that whole thing where they have nothing in common. Nice. Seth was delightfully snarky. "When were you guys ever friends? Was it when you were beating up her boyfriend, or spooning in a Tijuana motel?"

And then we discover that apparently all the problems with Seth and Summer's sex life have been worked out. Like, dude. And they both so deserve to have good sex lives. I *love* this show. I swear, it's like this episode was written just for *me*. I sob at the beauty of it all.

Well, there's some drama at the beginning. Summer isn't acknowledging Seth in public. Seth needs someone to talk to and -- woah -- Anna's back! How convenient! Great confidant. Too bad about the fugly clothes though. I actually stopped in the middle of the episode to IM misswindy and screech and scream over the utter and intolerable fugliness of her wardrobe. I was almost, *almost* too distracted by the wardrobe to pay attention to her lines.

And you know, I think Anna's had some slight improvement as an actor. When you, say, compare her to to the first ep. she was in. Or perhaps this is all in my imagination. Either way, I'm liking her. I just wish she would *change* her damn clothes. I think Anna and Marissa should hook up. NoFashionSense meets NoCommonSense. Teh luff! Then again, I don't think I could wish Marissa on anyone, and I actually consider Anna to be likeable.

Okay, so Ryan manages to make two non-dates, one with Theresa (who actually calls him while he's at school), and one with Marissa. He's making new friends! New hot female friends that he is mutually attracted to! Oh, this can't possibly go badly. Not. At. All. *snort*

So then it's Mrs. Cohen talking to her dad about so and so 'uncle' getting in trouble with the law. Kirsten is asked to talk to her lawyer husband, with ins in the DA. Sandy checks it out.

So switch to Luke meeting Julie in the school hallway. Parent teacher conference.He's all happy to see her. Of course he is. He spent the previous night fucking her. And Julie is a bit freaked about the fact that her lover is jailbait. Jimmy walks up and notices that Julie is unusually happy. Probably because her ex husband and older daughter aren't around to block the cock. Though oh my, does she go from extreme to extreme. Way to old to way too young. Good stuff.

Oh yeah, and I also have a weakness for hetero couples where the woman is older than the man.

So, yeah. Back to Seth Cohen's house of looove. He's doing Summer. He's upset that she's ignoring him. She's distracting him with fast talk and naked gymnastics. The phrase "the wedding is called off" pops in at one point. I love them as a couple. They rule with the hothotsex. And the good lines. Brilliant, brilliant lines.

Over to Ryan and Marissa on the non-date. Apparently Marissa sucks at video games.

Back to Seth's parents. Sandy asks Kirsten about this 'uncle' guy. Kirsten is vague and vaguer. Ooooh -- scandal building!

Back to -- OMG -- Julie Cooper's house of looove. Or rather, motel of looove. She's with him in a motel. They fuck. He goes to leave when her younger daughter calls. She gets a reality check. She breaks up with Luke. Lukes like "it's okay" when really he looks totally crushed. And I have lost my words. Until they come together again in a shriek as I see that Theresa is living in the motel Julie is sneaking away to for sex.

Back to school. Another semi-uncomfortable conversation between Ryan and Marissa. You know, maybe if she gets smarter I won't mind overmuch if they get back together eventually. As of now, though, I'm glad they are not together. Quite glad. Marissa arranges for a video game rematch and it's over to Seth getting more advice from Annaofthefuglyclothes. She tells Seth -- don't be a coward and take a stand.

Then Sandy talks to Kirsten's daddy again. He's found out that the business Kirsten's daddy runs is a tad corrupt and unlawful. But he's in a fix, because apparently Kirsten's the one who's been paying this shady 'uncle' character without realizing what a criminal he is, and if he goes down, so does she. Sandy has to be the devil's advocate.

Dude -- this ep switches scenes a lot.

So it's back to the Seth Cohen house of looove. Seth argues with Summer. Summer refuses to bend. Seth...withholds sex. Dude. I love this show. Reversal of traditional gendered constructs = the good. And then Ryan finds himself talking to an old friend from Chino who is apparently engaged to Theresa. Hold up. Theresa's working in the OC while her boy is back home thinking 'where the fuck did she go?' Ryan goes to confront Theresa. They talk. Everybody has issues.

It's back to Seth and Summer. Summer goes over to Seth's house and tries to seduce him. But apparently he's *serious* about withholding sex. Good for him. I admire him. And then, a similar situation. Kirsten's daddy (Julie's *old* flame) goes to Julie for a booty call. Jully gets pissed and slams the door on his face, successfully drowning out the curse word she utters.

And then, OMG, back to the Cohen residence. Ryan has invited Theresa over after the whole confrontation he had with her. She's eating dinner with the family. Telling embarrassing stories! Perfect! Only then...Marissa drops by. It's Ryan and his mini harem of "friends." Seth watches with melodramatic glee. Seth ends up talking to Ryan about his horrible love triangle. Oh wait, include Theresa's guy Eddie and it's a love rhombus. I love the lines they give the characters in the show. The lines totally make up for the fugly clothes.

So back to school. Summer's talking to Anna, trying to patch things up. Anna's all like -- why are you messing things up with Seth? Both of them are wearing fugly clothes, at this point.Summer makes the mose heart clenching speech of the episode and I *love* her. Dude. She's all: "I just don't know why he likes me. I mean he's way smarter, and we have like less than nothing in common and he's just gonna get bored with me because pretty much all boys do. And if everybody knows we're dating, then everyone will know when he breaks up with me -- which he will. Dumped by Seth Cohen. Real good for my reputation,"

And did I mention I *love* Summer?

So Julie calls Luke while he's at school. She booty calls him. But she's straightforward about it (unlike some people), and Luke is perfectly happy to go along. Anna tells Seth he has to prove his love for Summer because she's afraid of losing him. Then it's after school, and Marissa's visiting Theresa to talk things out. Ryan drives back to Chino to talk with Eddie. Eddie's all like if you want Theresa, know that I'm willing to fight for her. OMG! Drama! He's not confrontational about it either. He's just a good guy who really loves Theresa. It's sweet and tragic.

So Ryan talks to Eddie while Theresa talks to Marissa. The Theresa Marissa convo actually ends well. I think the two might even end up friends. Marissa leaves -- just in time to miss her mother walking into the room next door to Theresa's (for the aformentioned booty call). This is so going to blow up in everybody's faces some episode soon. The Julie/Luke ove is so scandal ridden I can't take it. I just can't.

Back to school! Summer's doing one of those things where she sells kisses. Seth, fed up with Summer, confronts her in front of everybody. He stands up on the booth thingie she's sitting behind and says, "Acknowledge me now or lose me forever." He is so my personal superhero. She gets up onto the booth bar area place with him. They kiss publicly. The guys turn away in disgust, because a supposed loser is apparently getting play from one of the hottest girls in school. All the girls in the audience, on the other hand, think it is the most romantic thing they've ever seen.

Because it is.

So after Marissa's left, Ryan goes to see Theresa. She is calling Eddie when he knocks on the door. She leaves her room to talk to Ryan. Ryan kisses her. It is hotness. And poor Eddie is talking into a phone with nobody on the other end.

Soap opera in disguise, people. Soap opera in disguise.



God, that was gratuitous squeeage. Gratuitous. I don't even think it was funny. Just gratuitous.

*sigh*



And, okay, I need an OC icon right the fuck now.